How To Deal With a Partner Who Doesn't Like Change

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Playing Advice For Dealing With a Partner Who Doesn't Like Change | Couple Court With The Cutlers

Change can be hard no matter what, but it can be especially challenging when you're in a relationship where one person thrives on it and the other just really, really doesn't like it.

That's the case for our married viewers named Nancy and Dave — so we called in none other than Dana and Keith Cutler from "Couples Court With The Cutlers" to help them work through it.

"My husband can't handle change," Nancy explains. "I just would like him to be a little more easygoing [and] go with the flow."

And she's not just talking big-picture change. Dave struggles with a change in the dinner menu, Nancy tells Dana and Keith.

From Dave's perspective, he explains what it feels like to think about and look forward to a certain meal all day, only to come home and discover that it's no longer on the menu. 

"The day is going on, and you're focused in on the dinner," Dave says. "You're expecting to come home and smell this aroma in the house." 

Ironically enough, Dana and Keith actually struggle with the same issue (Keith calls himself one of the most change-resistant people you'll ever meet) — so they gave their two cents. 


"You gotta recognize that's who he is," Keith explains. "You have to be sensitive to changing things up just for the fun of it. Recognize who you married." 

"I like to keep a little mystery," Dana chimes in. In other words, if the expectation isn't set so high or definitively, there's bound to be minimal disappointment. No dinner promises, perhaps?!


Ask yourself, "Is it worth the fight?" 

"It's going to be a good meal," Keith points out, "so you don't have to worry about that." 

Even on a larger scale, though, "there are just some things that you just recognize that you're going to have to give in on," he continues. "That's just the art of being in a relationship."

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